We wrote a driving etiquette for dummies and an article about things that stress us out the most. If we were to graphically represent this article, it would be in the form of a venn diagram with the above two articles intersecting here. We would also add a horror component to it, because, quite frankly, these videos are enough to inspire the yellow-bellies in us all. Here’s reasons why horror movies are like a walk through Disneyland in comparison to the traffic, roads and motorists in Sri Lanka:
1. When the swag factor royally backfires…
2. Red lights are for plebs.
3. Because pedestrians can go to hell.
4. Free Lectures?
Even if you aren’t a lawless creature who thinks the road is his, at some point, you’ll undoubtedly get stuck behind someone who thinks the road is his pulpit.
5. Death by Bus- Part I
Busses have the menacing look (and of course, the mentality) of a playground bully. If this was a gangster movie, the bus would be the hulking giant that compensates for brains with brawn. If we were to call for a show of hands of the number of people who were almost knocked down by a bus or ten, we’d have more votes than Maithree at the January 8 elections.
6. Death by Bus- Part II
More from Sri Lanka’s favourite and more preferred homicide machine. Move or die.
7. Lorry Vs. Bike
We revise the previous statement. Lorries are no better. What happens when you put the two together?
8. How To Do A Defender. Courtesy: White Van.
9. Cop Life
The traffic police are purely for ornamental purposes. An old Sri Lankan legend has it that they exist only to make traffic worse.
10. James Bond was here.
This is the best of the worst. This video is a revised edition of Dante’s Inferno. At first we thought it was all about motorcyclists… and then we realised that we’re all doomed. The lesson we take back from this: Busses are evil and must be put down. We repeat, busses are evil.
Feel free to share your horror stories/videos in the comments section below. We always welcome a healthy dose of fear.
A big shout out to Sri Lanka Traffic Violations, the home of angry motorists. You can find more harrowing videos on their Facebook page, just in case your fear needs revamping.